A Story of Connection

Recently my Director at work sent out an email asking if any of the clinicians had a brief story of "success, breakthrough, or knowing when a client connected to you (as a clinician)." This is a true experience that I provided to her.

I saw this client for the first time on March 11, 2025. On his clinical intake form the reason he was seeking individual counseling was listed as “Grief/Bereavement; Mood disorders”. Ok, pretty typical I thought.

He sat down on my office couch and said, “I’m not really here for grief counseling. I received an OWI charge last summer and I feel like everyone in the world knows about it. This will absolutely ruin my relationships in the community, relationships I’ve spent years developing. I can’t get away from the shame of it.” He had become tearful.

 I handed him a box of Kleenex and said, “Are you up for a brief allegory or story of someone I know very well who was in a situation similar to yours?” He nodded yes. I told him about a 23-year-old young woman, much older now, who was dealing with addiction issues when she was 23, couldn’t make eye contact with strangers passing in the mall because she believed she was wearing a big scarlet A that the entire world could see and therefore judged her by. I continued, years went on, she spent time in and out of treatment, but she finally got it. The shame was gone. She could see a happy, successful future for herself for the first time in years.

He asked, “What happened to her, do you know?” And I said, “You’re looking at her.”

From my office couch he fell to his knees and sobbed like a child longing for acceptance, respect, and understanding.

He continues therapy with me and has made a shit-ton progress from that first visit. Recently he told me, “Kristine, if you hadn’t shared with me what you did on that first visit, I don’t know if I would have made it, I really don’t.” I smiled and said, “Well, it’s in the past where it belongs.”